Home > daily observations, pop culture, sports > Reasons Why I Didn’t Watch the Superbowl

Reasons Why I Didn’t Watch the Superbowl

Before you even roll your eyes, no I’m not one of those people. Just because I have a master’s degree in Philosophy and think reading is fun does not mean that I’m the type that looks at organized sports as bread and circuses for the hoi polloi…that’s what American Idol is for. I was just thinking about it yesterday and today.

Despite my lack of interest in the game, or football in general, watching the Superbowl is usually something that people do who share my disinterest. It’s culturally relevant as it is one of the most watched annual events on American television. Some people don’t even watch it for the game. So here we go:

1) It took me fifteen minutes of scratching my head to remember who was playing. That indicates a supreme disinterest, usually I can remember who is playing after a minute or two. Last year doesn’t count as everyone knew that it was another boring match between a New England team and a New York City team.

2) I don’t care about Kurt Warner and his alleged tale of trials and tribulations. I’m sure some of us got the email about what a rough life he lived. He bagged groceries for less time than my friend Ryan. There are alot of people who have had far shittier jobs than working at a grocery store (i.e. me) and then made something big of themselves (i.e. not me, but a Swiss patent clerk comes to mind).

3) I’m not an unreasonably fanatical Pittsburgh Steeler’s fan. I never understand the draw of being a Steeler’s fan. They are like the New York Yankees of football, people fly the flags, wear the uniforms, and talk stats for a team from a city they have never been to. To a certain extent I get the Greenbay Packer’s fanaticism, being that they are one of the oldest teams in the NFL and it is pretty cool that they are publicly owned; but the Steeler’s aren’t exactly a legacy team and I’m pretty sure that pass by Terry Bradshaw was dropped.

4) The Halftime Show: do I really need to explain this one? It’s one of the most boring, trite, and corporately manipulated portions of an incredibly controlled event. It’s bland to the point of being not there. It’s too bad Fox doesn’t do an In Living Color Superbowl halftime show like they did oh so many years ago, back when Fox had balls.

5) I didn’t bet on the game, nor do I own any squares in a Superbowl pool. This can usually get me to care about the outcome of the game and force me to superficially check the scores. As for the squares, well, Western New Yorkers know what that means.

6) We just got USA in HD, they are running a House marathon, and I just recently started watching the show.

7) I’m not watching a game whose clock adds up to 1 hour, for six hours because NBC needs to sell airtime at 3 million dollars a minute. Commercials are there to sell things, they are not a form of entertainment and i won’t be hoodwinked into thinking that they are anything else but that. Just ask the three people who watched the Geico Caveman tv show how that worked out for them.

8) Good lists end with members of the Fibonacci Sequence.

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